Reflection...

On our way home from the mountains last Saturday, I sat there in the passenger seat trying to decompress from the funk I had been in all week. I'm not a holy roller, but after that experience I can honestly say that I understand the term "spiritual warfare" in a much clearer light. From the moment we started up the mountain a heavy cloud began to loom over me; a heaviness that I couldn't shake. It was depressing, yet exciting and meaningful all the same. The people there were unbelievable. We were invited to join them in the mornings for devotions and Bible study and several of them invited us into their homes for meals. Our children PLAYED LIKE CRAZY the entire week with the staff and candidate's kids. It has not been an easy adjustment for these families. It's very hard. VERY HARD. And most of them don't know exactly where they're headed, but the training that TMM offers is invaluable. Did you know that 95% of all missionaries leave the field and come home early because they were ill-prepared to do the work they set out to do? Yikes. HOWEVER, The Master's Mission has a 95% success rate. That's just amazing. I will say this much... THEY COVER ALL THE BASES. The ladies invited me to join them in their women's classes last Thursday. Betty Lou said, "Oh this will be a great day for you to join us. We're talking about death." (tongue in cheek) What? She and Barb talked all about their near death experiences while in Kenya and how to handle death when it happens... because it happens a lot. As I sit here typing this I am struggling to really find the adequate words to describe what was going through my mind as they chatted away. It's not very often that you find yourself a fly on the wall to a non-challant discussion on how to appropriately handle death. It was so matter of fact and light-hearted. Piece of cake. Moving right along...

Ok, so we stayed an extra day just because we didn't want to say goodye to all of our new friends. On Saturday we packed up, cleaned the guest house, said our goodbye's and headed HOME. YAY!!! I love my home. I am a nester, which is part of the reason why my time at TMM was so depressing. I can make anything a home y'all and I am not a princess, but those cabins were bleak. And the mice... I do not like mice. Not even one. So I spent a lot of my time trying to visualize how I would survive living in those conditions for 11 months. What made it worse was hearing Nicole (one of the candidate wives home on furlough from Kenya) say that the cabin is in many ways nicer than their home in Kenya. Now I know that mission work isn't about comfort. I am a smart and very practical girl. But it's just hard to wrap my head and heart around the realities. This happened to us at the very beginning of our adoption too. It took months for us to work it out and get back in the game. But we are fine now. I know that God will do the same for us if and when He does call us to full-time missions. At this time, we are focused on our daughter in China. First things first. Somehow being on that mountain made the adoption issues seem so small. I feel ready to handle what's to come our way in a way that I didn't before. Does that make any sense? Being here, surrounded by the comforts of home and friends and family and technology and my church and clean hospitals makes me feel so peaceful about the road ahead with Ashlyn. So if for no other reason, I am thankful for my time at TMM. It made me stop and really thank the Lord for the blessings in my life.

The only 4 bedroom cabin on the mountain. The others have only 2 bedrooms.

The wood-burning stove that heats the entire house.

The view into the family room

Kitchen

The bathroom

one of the kid's bedrooms

another kid's bedroom

upstairs hallway

master bedroom

All that said, when the day turned to evening and the kids were watching their movie in the back of the van with headphones on, we put our music on and sang to Phillips, Craig, & Dean the last 2 hours of our drive home. Phillip's, Craig, & Dean are an older Christian group that my Dad used to sit and listen to when I was a kid. Their music is very nostalgic to me. When I met Matt 17 years ago he had one of their CD's. He popped it in one day while we were driving around I that's when I knew I was going to marry him. Their music is "older", but so very rich with meaning. Here's one of my favorites. It is so fitting for this day.

Tomorrow is a new day. He is Risen!

Happy Easter!
-Rebecca