Longing For Home...

Do you long for Heaven?

I sure do.

Ashlyn continues to amaze me. She is a joyous girl to be around and I just love her attitude. She has thrown herself into this family with her whole heart. She laughs and plays and helps...

She does cry too...

3 nights ago she and Ansley had a little "disagreement" over laundry. They were sorting their things out of the mound of laundry on my bedroom floor and Ansley thought that one of my "personal belongings" was Ashlyn's. Ashlyn tried telling her, "No, it's mama's"... and Ansley insisted that it was hers. I'm not sure why Ansley pressed the issue and I'm not sure why it upset Ashlyn so much... Maybe because Ansley is younger and questioning her ability to reason... Anyhow, it made Ashlyn mad and therefore she ignored Ansley for the rest of the evening. At bedtime Ansley came to me very upset, telling me how Ashlyn wouldn't acknowledge her. I got out the handy dandy translator and tried putting the puzzle pieces together. When Ashlyn finally came out with it I took a sigh of relief. I told Ansley that Ashlyn was right about whose "personal belonging" it was, that she needn't correct her, and that she should apologize. At this point, Ashlyn was in her bottom bunk with the covers over her head. When I pulled them back, she had tears in her eyes. I tried to tell her that even the closest of familes and friends have disagreements... that everything was ok, and would be even better in the morning. Ansley apologized and the rest is history. I did worry that she would hold a grudge, but she didn't. Things were just fine after a good night's sleep...

After we schooled for a bit this afternoon, I asked her some questions... like, how long have you known about us, do you like us, are you happy about your new life with our family, and... Do you miss China?

She nodded her head "yes" to all of my questions.

I can tell she's happy. I can tell she is going to be just fine. I can tell she is comfortable with us. I can tell that she's thriving...

What I didn't know was that underneath all of that was a longing for her home.

I should have known, but I didn't.

And I don't know why that disappointed me, but it did. Then I felt really guilty for feeling sad about that. I would be missing home too...

Then it got me thinking again...

Because I've been thinking about "adoption" so much these days...

...The meaning of adoption and why it is so near and dear to our Lord's heart.

How does it parallel with my life here on earth and how I relate to my adoptive Father in heaven?

Of course she longs for her home.

So do I.

I long for heaven...

And that is exactly as it should be.

I told her that in time she will not be so sad... That when she starts to love us and love America, she will feel less sorrow for her China...

And that one day we will go back...

Blessings,
Rebecca